International Online Dating: Different Cultures, Different Challenges

There was a time when the largest determininga woman laugh is important to not only getting any
factor in any romantic relationship was proximity. Therelationship off on the right foot, but also to building
girl next door, down the street or on the other sidethe relationship and moving it forward. In the world
of town was pretty much the extent of the optionsof international online dating, humor is a necessary
available for most single men. As travel becamecomponent of forging a mutually satisfying
easier - and more necessary for work - after therelationship - but the rules are a little different. In
Second World War, the field broadened and peopleorder for you to make your international dream-girl
from different states and even different countrieslaugh, she is going to have to get the joke, and
began getting together. Still, however, proximity wasactually find it funny.
the overriding factor in the vast majority ofPart of the concern here harkens back to the
relationships. Letters and the occasional telephone calllanguage challenges mentioned earlier. Jokes or quips
were all well and good, but it was difficult to sustainthat rely heavily on double entendre or word play -
a relationship when there was only at best sporadici.e. "Last night I shot an elephant in my pajamas,
contact and no visual contact at all.what he was doing in my pajamas I'll never know" -
All of that changed, however, with the advent of thewill only work with your online partner if she has
Internet, and the various ancillary technologies thatsufficient English skills to appreciate them. Another
have grown with it - such as voice communication,area to avoid - at least at first - is humor that is
instant messaging and webcams. Communication withheavily dependent on sarcasm. Not only can sarcasm
people on the other side of the country - or thebe very challenging to someone with limited English
other side of the world - is now not only possible,skills, but it simply doesn't translate very well to the
but commonplace. With the explosion of theinstant message and/or chat room medium. Generally,
information age and the openness and ease ofit is better to avoid using it until your relationship has
communications afforded by the Internet,progressed to the talking and/or streaming live video
international online dating has become a multi-billionstage.
dollar a year industry, with millions of men and• Time Zones and scheduling: Of course, if you
women participating in it. Women in Greece are noware considering international online dating you are
enjoying the time they spend online with men inprobably going to realize that time differences will
Ottawa, and men in St. Louis are forging meaningfulexist between you and your partner. However, along
and rewarding relationships with women in thewith realizing that the difference in time is there, it is
Ukraine.important that you keep in mind what these
As with any other form of romantic relationshipdifferences mean in terms of your relationship. For
building, international dating brings with it new and, ininstance, returning to the example of our woman in
some cases, unfamiliar challenges. While it is true thatMoscow, if you are in New York City (Eastern Time
people all over the world share common needs andZone) then when you get home from work at 5:00
desires, people from different cultures possessand sign online, it will be 1:00 AM at your online girl
different customs and belief systems and, in somefriend's place! Conversely, if you want to have a chat
cases, process information differently. Assuming, forwith her just before you go to bed, the odds are
instance, that forging a relationship with a woman inthat she will have just awakened and be rushing
Moscow is going to be exactly the same as charmingaround (as we all do) to get ready for work.
a girl from Cleveland is probably not going to workOne of the keys to international online dating is
out terribly well. Below are a few things to keep inscheduling time with a woman you are interested in,
mind as you hit the international online dating scene.and then remaining on that schedule if at all possible.
• Language Differences: Obviously if you findThis will require a bit of give and take on both your
yourself an online dating interest from an Englishparts - staying up a little later, getting up a little earlier
speaking country (assuming, of course, that youror blocking out lots of time on the weekends.
primary language is English) then this shouldn't be anRemember to be considerate of her time, if you
issue, but what about if your interest - to use ourexpect her to be considerate of yours!
above example - is a woman in Moscow? Basically,• International Online Dating services: While there
most people who look into international online datingare many ways to meet women from other
will be able to speak English at some level, but theircountries online, many busy people (both male and
proficiency with the language will vary greatly. Thefemale) choose to use online dating services to make
key to meaningful communication is to make certaintheir initial connections. While virtually all of these
that, until you are sure of how well a womanservices charge their customers fees, some studies
understands English, you keep things fairly basic.indicate that not only does using services of this type
Avoid using long, complex words or sentences todecrease the time it takes to meet a person you are
express your thoughts to begin with, because thereinterested in, but also increases the likelihood that
is every chance that if you don't you will spend asyour online relationship will progress into something
much time explaining yourself as you will getting tospecial and fulfilling. When looking for an international
know the woman. Be patient, and be prepared toonline dating service, make certain that their website
explain what you mean when asked - and also beis secure, and verified by independent agencies
prepared to help her ‘find the right words'. Open(McAfee, GoDaddy, etc) as being safe. Make certain
communication and clear dialogue is essential tothat they list their fees upfront, and make certain
building any romantic relationship online.that they offer everything you are looking for
One thing you should always avoid at first is "text(private chats, streaming video chats, etc) before
speak", until you are very comfortable with theyou sign up. Just like anything else, when you are
woman you are communicating with. "LOL, "BRB"shopping for an international online dating service,
"BBIAB" and other such examples are certainlymake certain you read the fine print.
common enough in the states, but unless the womanInternational online dating can be a very fun and
you are communicating with is familiar with them,rewarding experience - and there is no reason not to
they will seem like gibberish - and could even servethink that if you lucky, you might actually meet the
to lower her first (or second, or third) impression ofwoman of your dreams. But as with anything else in
you. Additionally, you will want to keep your use oflife that is new and different, it is important to
slang to a minimum at first. If the woman has onlyunderstand some of the basics before getting into it.
remedial or even intermediate English skills, she isBy following a few simple rules, and making certain
likely not to have mastered even frequently usedthat you communicate in a clear and considerate
slang terms as yet.manner, who knows ... the perfect woman might
• Humor: One aspect of a man's personality thatactually be in Moscow, and yet only as far away as
survey after survey indicates is extremely attractiveyour laptop!
to women is his sense of humor. The ability to make