| How Independent Women Can Balance their Energy | | | | masculine man. To attract such a man, start giving |
| for More Appetizing Results on a Dinner Date | | | | way on some of the more mannish behaviors to |
| This may seem surprising to some of you, but as a | | | | energetically make room for him. Compare this |
| strong, independent woman, you have likely adopted | | | | concept to ballroom dancing where you can only |
| a lot of dominant masculine traits unknowingly. I | | | | have one leader and one follower. If both partners |
| encounter this all the time as a Dating Coach and | | | | try to lead, you simply step on each others' toes and |
| have found these behaviors can create an | | | | two followers won't work either for obvious reasons. |
| unnecessary stumbling block. One way this shows up | | | | One of each position is required for graceful dancing. |
| for me personally, is the seat I choose when my | | | | It's not always easy to modify the chick-in-charge |
| husband and I go out for dinner. | | | | act, but if you desire partnership with a balance of |
| Last weekend we were meeting another couple for | | | | power between two strong individuals, these subtle |
| dinner and were brought to our table to wait for | | | | energetic suggestions can make a huge difference. |
| them. The table was next to a wall and surrounded | | | | Keep in mind you aren't being asked to give up your |
| by other tables on the remaining three sides. From a | | | | power, just modify when and how you use it. |
| Feng Shui perspective, the command seat at a table | | | | 1) Let Him Talk to the Maitre D' |
| puts your back to the wall, so you can look out to | | | | When you enter a restaurant with a date, he'll likely |
| see everyone else. It's a seat of strength - because | | | | let you walk in first. But don't use your primary |
| that's the purpose of Feng Shui- to harmonize energy | | | | position as an opportunity to take over. Let him talk |
| to maintain a position of strength. | | | | to the hostess or maitre d' to say how many are in |
| If you simply watch which seat a man chooses, | | | | your party and put his name on the waiting list. |
| instinct takes over and he usually opts for the | | | | 2) Let Him Take the Command Seat |
| command position. Unfortunately, as a business | | | | When the host seats you, avoid the chair in the |
| women and assertive personality, that's the seat I | | | | command position leaving, it open for your man. Not |
| want as well. But when my husband is there - it's not | | | | all tables haven an obvious seat of authority, like one |
| the best choice- because I'm usurping his energetic | | | | in the middle of the floor. In most cases, the |
| place at the table. | | | | command position has one or more of these three |
| Of course my husband doesn't know about this Feng | | | | characteristics: it looks out over the room, has a |
| Shui principal and in fact calls the practice "fung | | | | view of the door, or it's back to the wall. |
| fooey." Even though we've been married for nearly | | | | 3) Let Him Order the Wine |
| six years, I still work on minimizing my natural | | | | Even if you're a real wine connoisseur, let your man |
| tendency to take over. Last night, I had the | | | | take the lead in selecting a bottle. Feel free to |
| presence of mind to ask where he preferred to sit. | | | | contribute your ideas or tell him what you'd like but, |
| Big surprise - he selected the chair with his back to | | | | let him order it from the waitperson. |
| the wall. | | | | 4) Let Him Take Charge of the Bill |
| If you are a highly independent woman in dating | | | | When the bill comes, let your date look at it first, |
| mode, this is a topic worthy of your attention. It | | | | unless you have a prior arrangement to treat him. |
| may also be a good tip off regarding your body | | | | Even if you plan to split the bill - (hopefully not on the |
| language and the messages you could be silently | | | | first date) you can still let him be "in charge" of the |
| telegraphing. While independence is a wonderful | | | | process. |
| quality, communicating too much autonomy can be a | | | | These simple steps allow a man to lead whether |
| major turn off to men. Even today, men want to | | | | you've just started dating or if you've been together |
| feel needed and staunchly stated independence | | | | several years. To avoid emasculating your guy at any |
| indicates that you can do without him. Of course you | | | | stage, rely on these suggestions. Supporting his |
| don't NEED him, but a good man is nice to have | | | | masculinity builds his ego, which almost always works |
| around or why bother to date? | | | | to your advantage. In most cases, a secure and |
| Many powerful women say they want a strong, | | | | happy man wants his woman to be happy as well. |