| When you use Internet dating sites, you increase | | | | show up – or, they go for one date and the |
| your opportunities to meet someone a hundred | | | | relationship is officially over, and they're back online |
| fold. If you are tech savvy or young, you probably | | | | flirting. |
| already know this. Lots of people know how to | | | | |
| navigate their way through the web and make use | | | | 1. Do you have time for a dating relationship? |
| of this venue to expand their social networking. If | | | | Some people's lives are so work intensive, they |
| you have not found your way into Internet dating, | | | | cannot squeeze another second of activity into it. |
| you would be wise to talk to others who have made | | | | They honestly want to believe they are going to find |
| use of this pathway. You need to learn the | | | | time to date – soon – but so far, they can't |
| techniques, tools, websites, language, and safety | | | | work it in. Sometimes at the end of a very long |
| measures that are necessary for your success. | | | | day, they will plop down with their computer and find |
| | | | | a potential date to talk to. But if they were rational |
| But whether you are new to this resource, or a | | | | about when they would find time to see the person, |
| seasoned pro, you may want to stop and think | | | | they would stop and ask themselves: when is my |
| about the following points. Here are five important | | | | life going to change? Before you meet someone, |
| questions to ask yourself before you set up a | | | | you want to look at the simple facts of how, when, |
| meeting with your new online interest. Before you | | | | and where am I going to have time to date this |
| meet for your first date: | | | | person? What can I do to the next week, or |
| | | | | month, or year to make sure I have some TIME built |
| 1. What drew you to this person's profile? | | | | into my schedule that allows for a social life? |
| Carefully think about this question. Often, we are | | | | |
| attracted to some of the same characteristics, over | | | | 1. Is your life ready to meet someone? |
| and over, that people manifest in their words and | | | | Ahh – this is always the tricky question because |
| expressions, yet we remain unconscious of the | | | | no one ever has their life totally together. But it |
| patterns. What exactly was in the profile that | | | | helps to have some goals in place and it's especially |
| resonated with you? For instance, are you habitually | | | | important to identify the areas you need to work |
| attracted to "bad boys" (or "wild girls")? Do you | | | | on. You will be less likely to fall into a compromised |
| look for someone who seems needy, lonely, or has a | | | | relationship if you are strong in these areas: |
| sad past? Or are you drawn to people who are | | | | |
| commitment phoebes? If you continually find | | | | - Finances – don't be lured into the trap of |
| yourself with another abusive, addictive, needy, or | | | | thinking you need more and more money. Get your |
| controlling person, look to see if any of those | | | | life in BALANCE, living below your means and taking |
| repeating characteristics are evident in this person's | | | | better care of what you already have. |
| profile. You can then make a list of your | | | | - Friends – yes, you need friends. No, you don't |
| deal-breaker requirements and clear your mind and | | | | need people around you who are negative, volatile, |
| heart about what kind of person you want to date. | | | | critical, mean, or substance abusers. You'll find that |
| Becoming conscious of what you want and don't | | | | when you weed out the people who are |
| want helps you make better choices. And if you do | | | | self-destructive or unkind to you, you have made a |
| find yourself with the wrong person for you, don't | | | | space for someone new who is supportive. |
| prolong the inevitable. End it quickly – with | | | | - Your Home – If you met someone, could you |
| grace. | | | | invite them over? If not, why not? That's what |
| | | | | you need to focus on – before you respond to |
| 1. Are you truly serious about wanting to meet | | | | online dating. |
| someone? | | | | |
| Online relationships and conversations, when you are | | | | 1. Have you been honest in your profile? |
| anonymous, can be so easy; so non-threatening; and | | | | The problem with the internet is that people get to |
| glib. You can suffer from the illusion that you are | | | | be anyone they want to be. Always do a |
| busy connecting with people, when, in fact, you could | | | | background check on someone before you get |
| be using this service for the opposite reasons – | | | | seriously into the relationship. But here's the bigger |
| which are – to stay away from a relationship. | | | | question: are you being truthful in your profile – |
| So before you set up that first date with someone, | | | | or are you pretending to be someone you're not. |
| think about whether you are really serious about | | | | Remember: like attracts like. You don't want to |
| wanting to meet – or do you just enjoy the | | | | attract another poser, so keep it straight. |
| anonymous repartee? Many people either don't | | | | |