| you tried to find out the statistics on single males | | | | married,” adds Mike. “I think Black |
| who happen to be Black? The majority of the | | | | women are in a tricky situation: there are men, who |
| information you will find when you search the | | | | want to be superior financially, professionally, etc. and |
| internet for “single males” is a vast | | | | are open to women with less than they have, and |
| array of dating sites that assure you that they are | | | | there are professional men who want an equal only. |
| the premiere location for finding the “man | | | | Men have the advantage in both scenarios.” |
| toy” of your choice, but there is nothing | | | | Single males, especially Black men who are educated |
| detailing why these single males are out there. | | | | and professional, often do not realize that they are a |
| So trying to find out the mindset of the single male | | | | rare commodity because of how they are treated in |
| population for Blacks is even more difficult. News | | | | the dating scene where sometimes being a |
| magazine shows, articles and reports cast distressing | | | | gentleman and not perpetuating a societal stereotype |
| details regarding the dearth of available single males, | | | | does not bode well for them. “If I am black |
| particularly Black men, for Black women to marry. | | | | gold I certainly don’t feel I am treated that |
| Black men are becoming an endangered species | | | | way,” states Derrel J. an entertainment |
| among the single male group, but there are those | | | | entrepreneur. “I met two Black women online |
| who are comfortable in that role and have no | | | | recently who don’t date Black men. I actually |
| problem in discussing why it works for them. | | | | liked both of them too, but in their minds, we all |
| According to Mike H., a former financial service IT | | | | carry certain stereotypes.” |
| professional, “I assume single Black men are a | | | | Representing the single male who is a gentlemen |
| rare commodity from things I read and feedback | | | | marks the beginning of the era of hope, even for |
| from single Black females I know. In college, we | | | | those who enjoy being single. “I enjoy single |
| were outnumbered by the Black women. I'm not a | | | | life, but I would prefer to be in a relationship,” |
| churchgoer and never saw the workplace as a place | | | | adds Derrel. “I enjoy the consistency of |
| for anything other than professional relationships and | | | | putting energy into something and someone with |
| the occasional friendship, so to meet someone like | | | | similar goals in mind.” |
| me would be through social events with people I | | | | Addressing the media hype surrounding Black men |
| know. I've had colleagues offer to introduce me to | | | | and their roles as single males is not a simple task, |
| their friends, but I prefer to meet people on my | | | | but it has to start somewhere. |
| own. I feel I'm approachable, but I'm not the type | | | | “The only thing I can say about the media is |
| one would find in a club.” | | | | a criticism I have of it concerning all subjects: there is |
| So, single males are not all “club | | | | too little coverage of people who conduct |
| crawling” to find Mrs. Right, and despite | | | | themselves honorably and do good things. For every |
| hearing the alleged experts talking about checking out | | | | dog, there is a man who treats women with respect. |
| local gyms and supermarkets, sometimes it is not the | | | | For every man with a record or illicit source of |
| location that does the trick if the single male prefers | | | | income, there is a hardworking man who is dutiful and |
| to stay that way. | | | | loyal,” states Mike. “I'm happy and |
| “I agree with sentiments expressed in | | | | content being a single Black male. Actually, as a kid I |
| reports about the increasing number of adults, both | | | | dreamed of living alone as an adult and having few |
| male and female, who remain single. One article | | | | attachments. The one problem is that I have become |
| mentioned the fact there are more alternatives | | | | settled and don't take as much advantage of my |
| available to today's adults, and I am probably in the | | | | freedom as I should. |
| minority of those because I never wanted to get | | | | |